Posted by admin on Monday Mar 29, 2010 Under Uncategorized

I am so pissed I could hit a puppy.

Alright, no, I could never be that pissed, and people who can need some serious help.

…aww, now I’m all sad thinking about people hitting puppies.

Okay, okay, I”m gonna be kinda vague here and just spout off about something that is totally irritating me right now and if I use a swear word or two…well, who cares?  No one is reading this, right?  And if you are, and you know me, then you know that I can swear like a mothereffing sailor, but the good thing is that I am suuuuuuuuuuper good at not dropping an f-bomb or anything like that around anyone who it would offend (like, at work). Anyway, ready for it?


No, seriously, fuck ’em.  Well, maybe not all of them.  I’ve had some great doctors in the past who have helped me out tremendously and I think they should be paid double what they already make because of how great they are.  I guess I’m talking about the doctor I just saw today. You know why she sucks?  BECAUSE SHE IS SO MATTER OF FACT.  Now, maybe that works for some people, but it doesn’t work for me.  I was once told that I had “White Coat Syndrome”.  I had visions of myself dying an ugly premature death, laying in a bed covered with purple splotches all over myself, including my half bald scalp and stub of an arm because surely, White Coat Syndrome makes amputation necessary.  But no, the nurse told me that White Coat Syndrome is when I get nervous about seeing the doctor and my blood pressure shoots up unusually high.  This always happens to me.  They give me a few minutes to calm down and take deep breaths, and then they take my blood pressure again and it’s normal.  I wish it could be normal the first time, but this is me we’re talking about here – nothing I do can ever be easy, as much as I would love for it to be.

So anyway, I am always nervous to see this doctor – or any doctor for that matter.  I know I’m not alone here – lots of people avoid going to the doctor because they don’t wanna hear bad news (I should know, I probably started the club on that one).  I didn’t get bad news (not very bad, anyway) and I didn’t get good news, either.  What I did get, however, was a big pile of crap.  This doctor told me something that I didn’t wanna hear, and it’s not that I don’t agree with what she said.  What I’m pissed about is how she said it – like, she could have said “Angela, I know that this is something that you are concerned about and I want you to know that I am here to discuss all your questions and options with you.  Why don’t you start and tell me what you’d like to talk about?”  That would’ve been an ideal response.  But what I got sounded more like “Angela, all those years of being so fucking awesome have resulted in you having cancer.  Please be sure to stop by at the front desk on your way out.” and then PEEEACE, she’s out the door.

Have you ever seen those commercials for “Cancer Treatment Centers of America”?  There’s a lady on there who is crying, saying her doctor walked in and said “Laura, you have cancer” and then walked out and didn’t even talk to her at all.  When I heard that, I was like “Whatever, doctors couldn’t be that cold hearted, right?”  WRONG!

I wonder if doctors take a course titled “Common Sense 101: How to talk to your patients without sounding like a douchebag who really could care less about what they’re going through as long as you get paid.”  If they don’t, they totally should.  Well, my doctor should, anyway.

FUCKIN’ A! dkajf;dlka;oife;adlhf;adl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

p.s. sorry for all the swearing, but I warned you right?

p.s.s. i encourage you all to use the word “fuck” on a daily basis; it’s therapeutic, really.

p.s.s.s. no I don’t have cancer, and I apologize if the context in which I used it offends anyone – it was not my intention 😀

p.s.s.s.s. my doctor BLOWS

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